Office Jokes

Jun 25th 2011

Don't Get Bossy with Me!

Two business partners go to lunch. One suddenly stands up exclaiming, “ Oh I forgot to lock the office safe!” His partner replies, “ What are you worried about, we’re both here”

The Difference Between You and Your Boss
  • When you make a mistake, you’re an idiot.
  • When your boss makes a mistake, he’s only human.
  • When you don’t do it, you’re lazy.
  • When your boss doesn’t do it, he’s too busy.
  • When you take a long time, you’re slow.
  • When your boss takes a long time, he’s thorough.

A man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner points to three identical looking parrots on a perch and says, “The parrot to the left costs $500.”“Why does the parrot cost so much?” the customer asks.The owner says, “Well, it knows how to use a computer.”

The customer asks about the next parrot and is told, “That one costs $1,000 because it can do everything the other parrot can do plus it knows how to use the UNIX operating system.”Naturally, the increasingly startled man asks about the third parrot and is told, “That one costs $2,000.”Needless to say this begs the question, “What can IT do?”

The owner replies “To be honest I’ve never seen it do a thing but the other two call him boss!”

7 Responses to getting caught asleep at the job!
  1. They told me at the blood bank this might happen.
  2. Ah, the unique and unpredictable circadian rhythms of the workaholic!
  3. OK who switched the decaf!
  4. I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work related stress
  5. Whew! Guess I left the top off the liquid paper.
  6. This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!
  7. This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time management course you sent me to

CategoriesBrain Teasers